To Untie is Such Sweet Sorrow

One in a million

Life is a series of events. Some great. And some very small. This is one of those. A small one. And great in it's own respect. The opportunity to wear a tie to work, every day, is one many "executive types" accept and practice. As do I. Unhappily. I do not include myself in the "executive type" club. Mind you, wearing the fucking thing isn't the worst thing that could happen in a day. No. And I digress... Back to life's small events. I tie that Goddamn thing around my neck every day as if I planned on hanging myself from a nearby tree. I loop over, loop through, loop under, and back through. I pull, and bam. I'm wearing my noose. In case no one's noticed, I fight small battles with what has been thought of as mild "obsessions." Reminder (1) and Reminder (2) and Reminder (3) I'm crazy. "A little." Sorta. And I happen to expect a tie to tie a certain way. Really. Certain. And today it happened. The application of the tie met every expectation. Perfect length. No crease between the collar on the face of the tie. The perfectly subtle and slight, delicate dimple at the neck of this fabulously tied tie. I admired it. I almost shed a tear. I proudly stepped out into the world and presented all its inhabitants with the perfect tie. I was asked for autographs, applauded, and admired. Well, maybe not. But I felt like it. When I got home from work, I reflected on the day I wore the perfect tie. When I began to undress, I heard bagpipes. And a holy blessing. I dismantled the perfect tie and wept.