the good times are killin' me

Sleepy words to share on a page. Moby's "Hotel" plays on... And the search for words pushes through. San Diego is fucking beautiful. Sales meetings aren't fucking beautiful. "And what would you do if the chef tells you he wants plates priced @ $5 each?" Brilliant. Personally, I would explain to the chef @ $5 each, he could take every single dozen of them and shove them up his ass. Sales. Yeah. But I don't say that. Not at the meeting. Not to the chef. In case the question begs an answer, the job, in the time it took Bossman to push send on an e-mail, suddenly darted in another direction. $27k last month. $22k the month previous. Over $80k this month. No idea how it happened. The preference is to attribute it to hard work rather than sheer fucking luck. Right place at the right time. I'm his goldenboy. For the moment. But enough about work.

It's Saturday night. Home from a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. "I'm and alcoholic, and my name's Darek." No kids. No adults. No one to play with. Shhhhh, it's so quiet. Still getting used to the feeling of loneliness. Miss Mom, and love, and balance, and... Just missing something. These feelings expressed at the risk of sounding pathetic. I'm not. Nor am I sad. Exactly where I should be.

Pictures from the girls line the cubby I call my office:

Everyone person in each picture is so Happy. Very cool. Just thought I'd share. And Moby plays on.

And since I'm on the subject of horses... The countdown to the Kentucky Derby is on. Saturday, May 7. The big race. It may not be a big deal to anyone reading these words, but for those that know me, I'm not the sit in front of the tube all day watching sports kind of guy. The Kentucky Derby, the oldest traditional sporting event in America's history, is a big deal to me. Last year, I posted this. I loved that horse. And I love this race. Very exciting. Place your bets.

Yeah, this is fucking random. Sorry. Just typing words. Too tired to save to draft.

"if God controls the land and disease, and keeps a watchful eye on me, well if he's really so damn all mighty, who would want to be such a control freak?"

Isaac is just sayin'