Raw and Uncensored

don't get your hopes up... raw and uncensored, as the term applies to me, simply represents truth. Yes, truth. not to take away from the usual mundanities, I think I just made up a word; but sometimes I try to write as if I was driven by the need to write, to satisfy the relentless compulsion to express thoughts feelings descriptions. in other words, I pretend like I can write. and when I pretend like I can write, bullshit comes out, and bullshit is not truth. what is it that I'm getting at exactly? my GOD man... you make a fine point... focus. I don't often feel raw and true. I feel, well, Diplomatic most of the time. speaking my mind, yet all slanted with intention to "be nice". fuck nice. I am nice. I'm tired, and the answers to questions or the reactions to statements pass through the "diplomacy filter" on an express non-stop ticket to the lips. it feels good. I sometimes wish I had what other select people have... have I ever mentioned that? but know what? I actually have it all. Delusions are fun. this is going nowhere. sometimes I wish I could type concurrent with the sparky synapses, firing to meet for brilliant posts, or articles, or books. I think I should read more.